I am tired. Being a public defender is a tired job. You get tired of your clients not showing up for appointments, dropping by the office without an appointment, not informing you when there is a MAJOR change in their life, informing you of EVERY little change in their life, not taking their case as seriously as you do, picking up new charges before you have finished untangling the current mess, und so weiter.
You get tired of the f*cking police, tired of hearing stories about police officers leaving people in the back of a patrol car with the windows all the way up and the air conditioning turned off. In the middle of August. You get tired of hearing prosecutors talk to defendants like they're a piece of shit and then turn around and try to make small talk with you like we're "in this together." Fuck you, we aren't on the same team.
Mostly I am tired of feeling like I am neglecting my children. I have left home before 7am every day this week and I have not made it home before 8pm any day this week.
I love my job.
I love my kids more.